This article mentions suicide. If you or someone you know needs help, resources or someone to talk to, you can find it at the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline website or by calling 800-273-8255. People are available to talk 24/7.
(NewsNation) — Former South Carolina pastor John-Paul Miller was struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts in the months before his wife, Mica Miller, died, according to material obtained by NewsNation.
Video footage and a voicemail NewsNation received through a Freedom of Information Act request shed light on South Carolina ex-pastor John-Paul Miller’s mental health.
He recently posted to TikTok, saying he looks forward to posting some 350 pieces of proof disproving what he says are lies in the media.
Meanwhile, NewsNation obtained video through a public records request that has now become evidence as part of the legal proceedings that John-Paul Miller’s ex-wife Allison Williams has brought against him.
Williams is seeking emergency custody of her two children.
In the video filmed months ago, John-Paul Miller says he was having suicidal thoughts, taking prescription lithium, adding that he has “demons” and mental health issues.
Addressing a congregation in the video, John-Paul Miller said:
I did not realize until this past week that I’m supernatural. And so I want to, I’m telling you this so that you can be encouraged that God can use you. So for the past four weeks. I’ve had the most horrible battle and horrible time of my entire life. I’ve never ever, ever, ever — not even close — been through what I’m going through right now in life. Not even close. Horrible. I mean horrible. So bad. I’m seeing a psychiatrist every week. I’m on 900 milligrams of lithium. I’m seeing a counselor every week. I’m going to inner healing. I’m going to deliverance three times a week with pastors in the area. I’m doing everything I can just to be able to get out of bed. I’m so depressed. I want to die. I’m battling suicidal thoughts. I have unforgiveness, hatred, demons coming out of me. Horrible. I’m in such a bad place. I spent my Friday night at Kelly’s house with women over 50 years old watching them play Bunco. That’s how horrible I’m doing.”
John-Paul Miller
NewsNation has also obtained a voicemail that has become evidence in the same custody battle. In it, Mica Miller asks Williams for the name of a counselor.
“This is my new number,” Mica Miller says. “Please don’t give it to anybody. But I just wanted to see who your counselor was to help you. I don’t want to pursue anything out of anger or vengeance or anything like that. I just want to be free, and have peace, and keep my soul right.”
Mica Miller was found dead in April and police ruled it a suicide. Details have surfaced about her marriage, divorce and multiple calls to the police about her estranged husband.
The woman’s family has called for a thorough investigation of her death, which happened while she was pursuing a divorce.
John-Paul Miller previously told NewsNation, “I have never once in my entire life ever hurt her in any way. Ever.”